"The Congressman From Up There"

Now, you guys. What do you suppose "from up there" means? And, who in his right mind would say something like that. "From up there" is Northern Nevada, actually. As to the second question: that would be our dearest Senator John "96%" Ensignificant.

The Reno Gazette-Journal had two cutesy pieces a couple of days ago. One features Jack Carter and the unknown Democrat running for Senate, the other featured John Ensignificant and the unknown Republican running for, well, the same thing, I suppose.

Now, the second article is really interesting. Senator Ensignificant can't get enough of Harry Reid, it seems. He loves the minority leader. If I were the wife of either, which thankfully I'm not, I'd get really worried:

Ensign said he is proud of the way he and U.S. Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., work together for the good of Nevada.

"Look what we've done with Lake Tahoe, Yucca Mountain, the Southern Nevada Lands Act, what we are trying to do for the Truckee River (flood control). All those things are Nevada issues "" defending the mining industry "" on and on and on," Ensign said. "He (Reid) works his side of the aisle and I work mine. Because of that working relationship and trust, we are able to get things done that frankly, members of the same party in some states can't get done."

Interesting. That is a line that should get used against some of the ensignificant Senator's Republican colleagues running for re-election this year like Senators Kyl of Arizona, Snowe of Maine, Talent of Missouri, Lott of Mississippi, DeWine of Ohio, Santorum of Pennsylvania, Hutchison of Texas, Hatch of Utah, Allen of Virginia and Craig of Wyoming. Wonder what they would have to say to Nevada's most forward thinker.

However, Senator Ensignificant really endears himself to the people of Northern Nevada with this line:

"I want to try to work with Senator Reid and whoever the congressman is from up there (Nevada's Second Congressional District) on getting the Truckee River flood control project authorized," Ensign said.

Maybe someone (hello, intern! yeah, you! you're reading this? take some notes) oughta tell the Senator that a Las Vegan referring to Northern Nevadans as "from up there" is not the best idea and might just have destroyed the nice carpetbagger campaign you've prepared against Jack Carter for the fall.

Also: Congressman? You've gotta be kidding, right? Out of the four major candidates, one is male and he's probably least likely to be elected this November. Get used, to the idea that you'll have to deal with a lady this fall. Not, that I wanna ruin your lovefest with Senator Reid. I'll leave that to Jack Carter.